The Spanish Estella, and thus the English and French Estelle, also derive from Stella which is Latin for star.
I had 36 wonderful years with Nana in my life. She got to see me grow up and go through many changes. I know what a blessing these years have been. Still, selfishly, I want all the days. I have become so accustomed to sharing my life with her, to seeing something that I'd like to share with her later and saving it. I have become really used to saying I'll see you tomorrow or Tuesday, I love you, one more hug, one more kiss and if I could go back I'd stay 20 minutes longer, every time.
A tribute to the star, the brightest light in my life.
Stella Arvizu Leal, 1930-2017
Photo taken at Esalen.
If love was a thing we could swim in, we would bathe together in the dream of our own being.
For a flash of a moment we slip into this skin, to feel passion again.
To touch, to linger, to love...
She spoke so softly to me on the astral, it was easy to see without sight,
there was no question of intention or direction,
just being and going with the flow,
But we wanted to put a finger on it, to have a unique print and the precise grip of a warm touch.
There is magic in being separate, in creating connection with effort,
while we can easily swim through and float in the abyss,
the longing will always persist,
to be one, and then unique
to be formed and formless, again.
This journey is the movement through,
and awareness of, the space between,
the space between dreams (the waking and sleeping)
There is a flash of knowing when the mind stops breathing
Body satiated, neither craving nor controlling
If words were things that had meaning we would say we were love and stop breathing.